So, for those of you who don’t know me by now, I believe to
be the best authority in matters best to me. However, because I have no time to
prove theories beyond my nose, I think it is best to say that in my universe, I
will be life time president and have no opposition. But since you choose to
read this, I guess you are my loyal servants and I am your royal majesty,
making everything know to you.
Now on to the subject for today! I have been thinking about
how to get my daughter to read books, in a culture that is a non reading
culture. For the past few weeks, I have had the privilege of fighting with her
to get her homework done, read a book and keep off TV, and found that my
efforts are futile. Thus my new resolution, to start her on these things that
will make her probably the shadiest, but sharpest kid in the class.
1.
Make movies out of books.
When Harry porter came out, the price of
the book doubled. Heck, I had to beg my lovely sister to get me the book, and I
still could not get a copy. I went to the book store and bought the book for
about 70k, which then was expensive. Last week, out of curiosity I went to peek
at the price of the book and it had not only doubled, it was no longer in the
store! So I thought to my self, If I can stand through such, I might as well
advice people to make movies out of books. Thus all these Chinua Achebe books
become something to watch. I wonder how the movie to the book, ‘Lord of the
Flies’ would be like; it might be stacked up in the horror section. But
thinking about all of that, please don’t go watch Pompeii if you read the book…
you might have to ask for your money back unless you are in a cinema which is
like in 5D!
2.
Make songs out of books
Who said I can’t sing a whole story about a
book in one song? Ask Bugembe about this and he might side with me. Well, the
song might be 8 minutes long, with each verse more shaddy than the next, but
don’t we all sing to Kani or Ani and still wait for those parts where the lady
sings along? So, I think it can be done. We just need less Beibers and more
Bugembes in the industry and we shall have hits that will become infamous for
their edutainment and thus a new culture shall be born!
3.
Don’t force it, beat it down their throats.
The idea of spare the road and spoil the
child… always seems the right way to go. But I have never found someone
actually doing that. So if you find me in prison, just know I was trying to
spare the Kampala roads that have pot holes larger than the Kabaka’s lake.
When we were younger, my dad caught my sister
eating newspapers. When she was asked why she was doing it, she said she was
tired of reading and hoped that the information would go down her throat
(true-ish story). I think that is how I am going to get my daughter to learn
how to read a lot more. Clearly stuff the
information down her throat and hope that along the way, all those books
she has swallowed will work for her. If that doesn't work out, I am pretty sure
there is something that will be stuck in her throat long enough for her to pass
her exams at all levels of education!
Well, I think this has been a testament according to the
book of Twonjex, and thus here ends the reading. Go ye forth to spread my
gospel and if no one believes you, remember to tell them, it is all in "his" universe and they should try joining it!!!
